Caring at Home - Lucky You!

Am reading the following the Crusade with great interest. Unfortunately do not expect that much will change even should the Crusade be successful in certain areas - there are too many things wrong with our treatment/care/provision for the elderly to be put right apart from possibly bits and pieces over a lengthy period of time.
Loved the articles on 15 October about caring at home and Ann Widdecombe's article on Saturday. Having an elderly parent with Alzheimers I would like nothing better than to look after her full time, unfortunately I do not have the premises to be able to do so, nor the money or space to convert my house to assist her (ie downstairs bathroom etc.)I also work full time - for necessities, not luxuries. Unlike many, I don't classify having a 40" TV as a necessity, and have not had a holiday in 10 years. If I was to give up work to care for my mother, then I would in all probability end up losing my house etc. etc. I have looked into it all in great detail and know what assistance I would and wouldn't get and it is an impossible solution. The ladies who are able to look after their parents are so lucky - I know it is extremely stressful, having being an almost full time carer and working at the same time for the past 4 years. My mother was living independently(with care)until fairly recently, however following a minor fall has now ended up for assessment/review/ rehab in our local cottage hospital which specialises in elderly and EMI care. The ward is at the end of a corridor and if you see a nurse during the time you are there you are extremely lucky. I realise that they are very short staffed - however that is not my problem - my problem is my mother and the care/non care she receives. Being left in a chair all day results in her becoming totally non responsive and lethargic and the whole situation following the fall i.e. general hospital admission prior to cottage hospital admision has put added stress on her and exacerbated her Alzheimers. If I were able to look after my mother I would, but whichever way you look at it this is impossible. I totally support people who are able to do this, but please don't classify those of us who can't as non caring - the guilt every time I leave my mother is constantly with me. We are currently looking at the possibility of residential homes for her and the stress of the whole situation becomes worse as you realise that this is NOT what you want for your parent but this may be the best that you can get. I want my mother to be safe, secure and cared for. Is it too much to ask for her?

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